


dudley dursley the matchmaker of magical morons

by meshtams



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: AU, Bisexual Harry Potter, Bottom Draco, Desi Harry Potter, Draco Malfoy in the Muggle World, Draco isn't a death eater, Gay Draco Malfoy, Good Draco Malfoy, Good Dudley Dursley, M/M, Tall Draco Malfoy, alternative draco malfoy, emo draco malfoy, set in the summer before sixth year
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-04
Updated: 2020-10-04
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:14:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,778
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26821972
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/meshtams/pseuds/meshtams
Summary: upon leaving the manor to avoid taking the dark mark, draco finds himself in little whinging, where he meets a helpful muggle who turns out to be the cousin of his long time 'unrequited' love, harry
Relationships: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter
Comments: 4
Kudos: 192





	1. Draco

“Draco, the Dark Lord will be here in an hour, and he will be marking you. This is an incredible honour, and I expect you to be awaiting his arrival in the largest drawing room in your best robes in 45 minutes. I expect you to treat this with the respect it deserves, and not to embarrass the family more than you can help.” Lucius sneered at his son.

Head bowed, Draco responded “Yes, father.” He had known this was coming for a while, and he knew his mother would be waiting for him in his room with an unregistered portkey and his already packed, shrunken bags, all stuffed into his new 'plushie backpack' that looked like a black teddy bear. All she had told him was that he would be near London, and would be in a muggle area, and therefore aside from his school things in his trunk, he would be sent with only the muggle clothes he and his mother had purchased specially the week prior. He would obviously never admit it to his father, but he actually liked the jeans, t-shirts and sweaters much more than he liked wizarding clothing, and he was absolutely in love with the boots he had bought.

As he got to his room, his mother immediately wrapped him into a hug and pressed a kiss to his forehead, tears in her eyes. “You need to change and then go, I have the portkey here,” she held up a silver key, “And you should have enough muggle money to stay in a hotel until school starts, just ask a local where one is. I’m so proud of you.”

“Are you sure you can’t come with me?” Draco’s silver eyes were damp with unshed tears.

“You know I can’t, darling. You’ll be fine. Now get changed, the portkey sets off in 15 minutes.” She kissed his head one last time and left the room, leaving Draco stood in the middle of his bedroom and shaking slightly. He brushed a tear from under his eyes and shook himself, turning to change into the muggle outfit he had laid out ready. A torn up stripy sweater that fell down to mid-thigh, over a black t-shirt and black tight jeans, and his new “Dr Martens” boots, which had thick soles and a zip up one side. He messed his hair up intentionally, using his wand to remove the product that usually held it in place. Just as he was spelling away the last of the hair potion, his mother walked back in through the door.

“Okay. I’m ready.”

“You look so handsome, darling. The muggle boys won’t know what hit them!” She laughed lightly, and he blushed hard.

“Mother!”

She laughed at the outraged expression on his face. “I’m going to miss you so much, my love.”

“I’m going to miss you too, mum.” He threw his arms around her, knowing that this was probably going to be the last time he saw her until the end of the war, presuming they both survived.

She hugged him back tightly before pulling away and handing over the key. “Only a few seconds now, love.”

Draco barely had a chance to nod before he was being whisked away in a spiral of colours.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want y'all to know that after writing this I then bought the "torn up stripy sweater" I had in my head and gave to draco in four different colors lmao


	2. Dudley

Dudley Dursley may not have been the smartest person, nor the kindest, although he was trying to work on that, but he noticed that the blond boy sat awkwardly on the swing at the park near his house didn’t quite fit. He’d never seen the boy before, and he looked decidedly lost in a way that looked… odd. Curious, and hoping to help him, he approached.

“Hey, are you lost, mate?” He flops onto the swing next to the boy.

The boy looks up harshly, a vaguely terrified look in his eyes. “I suppose. Where are we?”

“You’re at a park in Little Whinging.”

The boy pulls at the loose threads of his distressed sweater awkwardly. “And where’s that?”

“It’s in Surrey. How’d you even get here?” Dudley was a bit bewildered as to how this guy had ended up in a park somewhere he didn’t even know the name of.

“I- my mother sent me here. My father was going to make me join a murderous cult today so I had to run.” Suddenly it hit Dudley- this guy was a wizard like Harry! That’s why he seemed so weird, and seemed to have just materialized in Surrey, and the cult must be those death people that were after Harry.

“Oh, alright, that makes sense. Are you alright?”

“Not really.” The blond shrugged.

“Do you want to talk about it? I’m Dudley, by the way.”

“Draco.” Dudley absently wondered if this was the same Draco his cousin was obsessed with- surely even in the Wizarding world, that wasn’t a common name. “And I guess.” Dudley smiled in what he hoped was an encouraging way. “Well, my father is a fascist, I’m probably not going to see my mother for at least a few years now, when I go back to school everyone is going to hate me, either because I betrayed ‘the cause’” he snorted derisively. “Or because I’ve been a bullying prick for 5 years to please my father.” Draco really seemed to be on a roll now, using expressive hand gestures to punctuate his words. “On top of that, the guy I’ve been in love with for 5 years can’t stand me because I have absolutely no idea how to express myself and always end up being a bastard to him.”

“I get that. Not all of it, obviously, but my parents abuse my cousin, and until this year I’ve always bullied him and everyone else because of it. I’m trying to do better now, like. I mean, at home basically all I can do is sneak him food, but I’ve stopped being a prick to everyone and shit. So, like, I kind of understand a bit.”

“Yeah, I suppose you do. I can’t even be that upset about most of it, because it’s not as if I don’t deserve it after everything I’ve done, and its my own fault bloody Potter will always hate me.”

That brought Dudley up short. He was now positive that this was the Draco Harry had mentioned during their conversations this summer. “Wait, Potter? As in Harry Potter?”

Draco’s head snapped up. “I thought you were a muggle?!”

“That’s a non-magic person, right?” At Draco’s shocked nod, he continued. “No, I am. Harry’s my cousin.”

All of the blood drained out of Draco’s already pale face, but before he could respond he heard a very familiar voice coming across the park.

“Dudley! Your parents want you home for dinner in 10!” Harry was walking towards them in too-big jeans belted tight around his narrow waist, falling-apart white trainers and a plaid shirt that flapped as he walked. As he got closer he seemed to notice Draco finally. “Wait-Malfoy?!”


	3. Harry

“Wait-Malfoy?!” Harry’s heart was pounding in his chest. That was Draco Malfoy, wearing muggle clothes, talking to Dudley. ‘I must be going mad.’ He thought to himself. ‘Clearly I’ve been daydreaming about him too much and now I’ve finally lost it.’

“Hey, Harry. Draco was just telling me about how he’s had to run away from home ‘cause he’s not as big of an arse as he’s always pretended and he’s actually in love with you.”

“Dudley, what the fuck!” Draco stood up from his swing angrily, swinging what looked like a stuffed black bear onto his back and storming away.

“Dudley, I don’t reckon he wanted you to tell me that.”

“Why not? You’re in love with him too, aren’t you?” Dudley looked confused.

“Wh-how do you know that?”

“You literally mention him every time we talk, like, more than your friends even.”

“Right. Well, I need to go after him. See you later, Dud.”

Harry took off running towards Draco, who was already almost at the other side of the park. “Draco! Jesus Christ, Draco!!”

“Fuck off, Potter!” Draco yelled over his shoulder and tried to speed up, but Harry caught up with him not a moment later, grabbing his arm.

“Draco, bloody hell, do you even know where you’re going?”

“No, nor do I care. Let go of me.”

“Was Dudley telling the truth?”

“What difference does it make?” Draco sneered, but the look didn’t quite sit right over the insecurity painted across his sharp features.

“Quite a lot actually. Can I kiss you?”

“What the fuck, Potter? Why would you want to kiss me?”

“Draco, I’ve been in love with you for years. Also, your new look is, like, hot as fuck.”

“I-oh.”

“So, can I?”

“Uh, yes. And yes, Dudley was telling the truth.”

Harry’s handsome face split into a huge grin that wrinkled the scar down the side of his face, from his forehead to just under his bright green eye, and he reached out and grasped the front of Draco’s sweater with one square, brown hand, using the other to tangle into Draco’s white-blond hair and pull him down to kiss him deeply. Draco melted into Harry’s touch and opened his mouth, practically whimpering as Harry pushed his tongue past Draco’s lips.

They kissed for what felt like both hours and seconds, before one of Dudley’s old gang, Piers Polkiss, walked past and shouted “Faggots!” at them.

“Fuck off, Piers!” Harry practically snarled, slipping one hand into Draco’s.

“Always knew you were a queer, Potter.”

“Congratulations? Draco, lets go.” Harry turned and practically dragged Draco by the hand until they were around the corner, when he pulled him back into his arms and kissed him softly. “Sorry about that. He’s one of Dudley’s old cronies.”

“No problem. Is there a hotel around here? My mother gave me muggle money for one but I have absolutely no idea where anything is here.” Draco rested his forehead on Harry’s shoulder as Harry’s arms threaded around his waist to hold him close.

“Not in Little Whinging, no. You could stay with me, if you want. It’s horrible, but I’m going to the Burrow, that’s the Weasleys’ house, on Friday and you could come with me.”

Draco looked up and made eye contact with Harry. “The Weasley’s aren’t going to want me at their home, Harry.”

“If I explain that you’re, you know, with me,” He pressed a chaste kiss to Draco’s lips to illustrate his point, “And that you’ve left home, they’ll be fine with it. I mean, Ron and ‘Mione know that I’m in love with you, and Molly will just try to feed you. I promise.”

“Are you sure?”

“Positive.”


End file.
